oh my lord

Can’t believe Tottenham Hotspurs knocked Liverpool out of their Champions League spot. But Harry Redknapp has been immense, so there’s no denying that they fully deserve the Top 4 finish. The team, manager, and Jermain Defoe have been outstanding this season. Oh well, at least it’s a bird replacing another bird.

Liverpool, on the other hand, have been entirely disappointing and heart-wrenching. Everytime I watch a match, I’m filled with hope and anticipation. And I always end up with a sad, heavy sigh.

I need a break from Liverpool. This relationship is too unhealthy for me.

Let’s fall in love again in August, shall we?

For now, it’s Spain and Brazil for the win in World Cup!!! God I love the World Cup! Attending a World Cup match has been my dream since I was 12..and I will do it someday.

match fixer

Immensely tall, insanely funny, very geeky, super cute, humble, self-effacing, and in my opinion, the most entertaining columnist to be writing for Singapore – Neil Humphreys!!

AIYO, THIS ANGMOH, SO CUTE LAH!!

(He was already half-squatting for this photo..and STILL half a head taller than me. 1.94m Giant.)

I also got the chance to see his adorable baby girl and gorgeous wife. They are all so nice. Neil Humphreys deserves all the success he has gotten so far..he’s my favourite writer by far! Everything Neil Humphreys writes, be it his books or his columns, makes me laugh without fail. And I mean LOL-kind of laughter. I once laughed out loud while reading his book during a train ride in the morning..and all the office workers around me looked at me like I’m an idiot. I always promote his works to my friends, and am proud to say that I’ve successfully converted quite a number of my friends into his loyal readers.

And the first thing he said to me? – “You’re lovely!”

OMG.

The first thing that went through my head was, “Why can’t local men talk like that!! So eloquent and expressive!” But then again, if local men talk like that, I will be very disgusted. So uhm yeah, I KNOW I’M CONTRADICTING MYSELF.

Another photo taken by one of his publicists, I think. I ended up taking about 5 photos with him with 5 different cameras, I don’t know why. I only heard people vaguely shouting, “This is for your Facebook page!!!”

I have been a fan since his first book – Notes From An Even Smaller Island – and have collected 5 of his books so far. (He was whining at Kinokuniya that he feels old talking to me). He’s so nice lah!! I cannot stop gushing about him!

I asked him how the journalism industry is like these days, and he immediately scrunched up his face and gave me a very honest shake of the head. You would think that he would be saying only good things about the local leading papers (since he writes regularly for them), but he told me very frankly about the things that he doesn’t like..I was taken aback by his honesty, because I might have been a spy for the papers right? AIYO, HE’S SO NICE LAH. And our local papers should be thanking their lucky stars that he is writing for them.

Match Fixer is his latest fictional work. Very different from his previous works, very different. He keeps emphasising that it’s fictional..but. Hmm.

If you are a football fan and a Neil Humphreys fan, this book is a god-send. Heck, you don’t even need to be a Neil Humphreys fan..as long as you like football, you will enjoy this book. If John Dykes approves of it, then there is no doubt about its quality.

After you finish this book, you will have a whole new perspective on the often-used term at local football matches – “kelong”.

Notes From An Even Smaller Island

Liverpool 2 – 0 Man United

Everybody was against Liverpool. Of all the match predictions I’ve read, 90% went ’2-1 to Man Utd’.

Even I was afraid to watch the match, but I tuned in anyway because you’ll never know what Liverpool can deliver. They always turn up spectacularly against the biggest teams, but under-perform against the weaker teams.

Mascherano and Lucas ruled the midfield. Benayoun was a genius on the pitch. Alonso who? It was just such an excellent display of teamwork.

Man Utd fans are now whining about the match being unfair. LOL the irony of life! I didn’t know the word ‘unfair’ exists in their footballing world. The duration of added injury time was ridiculous! (Of course, this is the norm whenever Man Utd is not winning.)

NAILED IT, REDMEN!!! I’m soooooooo happy!! Best BPL match of the season so far.

shamon!

I am so done with Liverpool. Watching them play just makes me depress. It’s hard for a team to be a title contender if they’ve already lost 3 games by October.

happy days

Glen Johnson is soo brilliant.

Sometimes people jump to conclusions way too quickly. It’s silly how Liverpool are being written off for the title after just 1 game at White Hart Lane last weekend. Zzzzz. It’s like they’ve totally forgotten that the EPL lasts all the way till May 2010. Logic and rationality, hello?

Sometimes when I watch Gerrard play I can’t help but laugh because someone I know plays so much like him. The non-stop charging like a bull and the undying enthusiasm of an Energiser bunny..haha.

do not want

I knew it. I had this gut feeling that Tottenham will step all over Liverpool, and they did.

If you are a supporter of Chelsea/Man Utd/Arsenal, you have the luxury of going, ‘Oh this is too easy’ and sit back in comfort while your team goes against the mid-table teams. But if you’re a Liverpool fan..you’ll never know what you’re going to get.

• Steven Gerrard is not our best player. Neither is Fernando Torres. Yossi Benayoun is.
• Benayoun should be starting instead of Ryan Babel. Benayoun should always start.
• The team doesn’t really miss Xabi that much. The team just sucked.
• Tottenham played well, Liverpool played very badly.
• Why is Robbie Keane so brilliant at Tottenham but complete crap at Liverpool? Why is the sky blue? Why do birds fly?
• Tom Huddlestone is an insufferable idiot.
• Lucas Leiva isn’t the best player out there, but it made me happy when he defended Torres.
• Please, Voronin should’ve clearly gotten that penalty! It was a red card offence! Bloody useless wimp of a referee.
• Bah.

You’ll Never Walk Alone

When you see Fernando Torres in action right before your eyes, it’s not hard to understand why he is adored and admired by millions. Everytime he gets the ball, the entire stadium roars in jubilation because we know every single moment he has with the ball equates to a goal-scoring opportunity. It’s just so exciting watching him in motion..and he is seriously too pretty to be a guy.

But it was a bit disappointing that he strolled/slow-jogged through most of the match, with Pepe Reina doing nothing 90% of the time. Such a walk in the park for them. Singapore looked like it was fielding 10 defenders in the second-half and despite that, their defence was still all over the place..a pity because they were pretty good in the first-half.

It’s such a great feeling to hear the entire stadium belting out ‘You’ll Never Walk Alone’ in unison. I love Liverpool because of its players and what the team stands for. Instead of singing ad nauseam about glory and success (*coughs Man Utd coughs*), Liverpool’s club song asks one to be brave and walk forward proudly even in the darkest hours. How awesome is that!?

Dirk Kuyt was super hardworking and totally selfless as usual. If anyone wants to know what is the true meaning of ‘teamwork’, all they have to do is look at Kuyt play. Yossi Benayoun is in a class of his own, superb player. I hope they stay with Liverpool forever. Christian Nemeth is likely to be the next favourite among Liverpool fans after his impressive run. Mascherano did not disappoint..I knew he would stir up something..and stir he did. LOL.

Rafa was obviously in a good mood since he played Torres for 30 minutes and the crowd got to see almost all the big names. Oh happy day. Now people can STOP saying that Liverpool hasn’t won anything since the 2006 FA Cup. They now have the Merlion Cup! Seriously though, I don’t know what that Cup was all about.

Match was pretty well-planned..no chaos..no slow-moving or messy queues..everything was great except for the exorbitant prices on drinks. Fans were well-behaved and enthusiastic. Music by The Beatles were played during breaks <3.. and I had a highly entertaining match commentary thanks to wise cracks from fellow fans sitting in the Kop.

• “So this is the difference between competitive and non-competitive football.” (LOL.)
• “Careful ah, Bennett!!” (Daniel Bennett, the Lions defender, said some stupid stuff before the match and offended many Liverpool fans. Boos went round the whole stadium when his name was mentioned during the starting line-up. Lucky prick got to exchange his shirt with Torres though. I wonder why he bothered to do that since he declared it’s better to support Manchester United. Pifffff. Just go away please.)
• “Kayu lah, referee!” (I see that Singaporeans shout this line all the time, even if the referee isn’t at fault.)
• “What you doing ballboy!!! Dreaming ah! Statue!! Stone!!!” (A ballboy didn’t react after a ball went out and Mascherano had to walk towards him for a ball.)
• “My grandmother can kick better!” (When David Ngog shot a feeble free-kick directly at the goalkeeper.)
• “What you doing Voronin!!! Go home!!!!” (Self-explanatory. But he did score…)
• “Do something lah Singapore. Do something!!” (When Liverpool was leading 4-0.)